my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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