By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Randomize
