rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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