if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
I AM VODKA MAN
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Randomize
