i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
