He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Randomize
