do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
He keeps bees of course he's weird
You've changed since you got that strap on
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
