nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
