I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
