he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
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