whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
