Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
