Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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