What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
