couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize