Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize