Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
