dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
