I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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