dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
babies were throwing up all over the place
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
