To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Randomize
