is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
