idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
