great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize
