I think I died a long time ago.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
