I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Randomize
