it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
