please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
Randomize
