? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize
