yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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