apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
