I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
