I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Randomize
