He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
