and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
