I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
