oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Randomize