I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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