so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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