apparently the secret to your success is patron
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I just blew my weed a kiss
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Randomize
