i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
