spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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