you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
