it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
i think my cat just said my name.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
