so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
Randomize
