I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
