Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Randomize
