mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
I can tuck mytits in my pants
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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