and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize
