YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Randomize
